It’s no surprise the French have 17 words for surrender. Hopeless, existential romantics either say nothing or too much. Say less. May my silence echo in your mouth where my name used to be. Or at least, that’s what I imagine hopelessly existential romantic French people say when they’re dreapeau blanc-ing, white flagging on someone…Read more Soumission
CPTSD
PSA
Some of us spend our lives living in a crime scene. Here are some things to remember: It wasn’t our fault if our body went limp and we never fought back. We’re not a terrible awful person if we can’t sleep, can’t look at our own face for a few years, can’t eat, can’t stop…Read more PSA
Ride On
After my first divorce I got hit with a bout of full blown clinical depression. It felt like I swallowed a half ton magnet that was either trying to pull me into the center of an eternal void or electrocute me. So, not the funnest time. Because I’m a therapist, I knew I needed to…Read more Ride On
Wild
Roughly twenty years ago I tripped over this book on the floor of Bunch of Grapes; a shop on the vineyard. Later that night I succumbed to the most nurturing, nourishingly magical idea of moving to the farthest corner of the country, getting lost in a forest dripping with moss and being adopted by the…Read more Wild
Ghost Story
Hunger is just a mask for shame. We blame ourselves for the wounds that make them incapable of reciprocity; chronically apologizing, appeasing, guessing at what’s normal and attempting to predict or anticipate their every need. Intergenerational nightmares are the real monster. If we’d just turn on the light and collectively console ourselves, paradise, as it…Read more Ghost Story
Shinrin-Yoku
Your roots teach us The meaning and stability of secure attachment That through grounding We too can grow Your leaves invite us To trust the cyclical nature of life That surrender is not goodbye But rather a requirement for evolution Your buds, blossoms and seeds Remind us to feed ourself And thank, not only the…Read more Shinrin-Yoku
Safe
Home Plate, Photo Credit: Nathan Vines It’s taken nearly half a lifetime to afford the stability that allowed me to tackle the hardest parts of my healing. Things are relatively more peaceful but the blooming onion of life has a hell of a lot of layers. Pass the fancy sauce. There’s a reason we find…Read more Safe
Golden
Miracles surface when we keep going and humbly surrender to this bizarre experience called life. Less becomes plenty. Chaos transforms into peace. Unfathomable pain is cured. Questions answer themselves and one day there’s nothing left to do but look into the light and whisper ‘I wonder what will happen next.’ I wish it hadn’t taken…Read more Golden
Fall
The moon rises In Pisces As retrograde Libra Attempts to leave her In pieces on the front porch Of confessions through a screened door Forgive me mother, father, brother, sister For I have sinned against Harvested orgasms Organs Silently screaming At the incisions Of hot and cold karmic seasons Where gaslit fires blaze With misguided…Read more Fall
Believe
Photo credit: Nathan Vines Once upon a time, I tried explaining my ‘container belief’ theory to my therapist. For whatever reason, when I’m the client, I lose all capacity to make rational sense and instead ramble on in half-baked metaphors loosely beaten with full blown emotion. She’s somehow always understood me and for that I’ll…Read more Believe
Born in Providence 