Home Plate, Photo Credit: Nathan Vines It’s taken half a lifetime to afford the stability that allowed me to tackle the hardest parts of my healing. Things are relatively more peaceful but the blooming onion of life has a hell of a lot of layers. Pass the fancy sauce. There’s a reason we find ourselves…Read more Safe
recovery
Golden
Miracles surface when we keep going and humbly surrender to this bizarre experience called life. Less becomes plenty. Chaos transforms into peace. Unfathomable pain is cured. Questions answer themselves and one day there’s nothing left to do but look into the light and whisper ‘I wonder what will happen next.’ I wish it hadn’t taken…Read more Golden
Believe
Photo credit: Nathan Vines Once upon a time, I tried explaining my ‘container belief’ theory to my therapist. For whatever reason, when I’m the client, I lose all capacity to make rational sense and instead ramble on in half-baked metaphors loosely beaten with full blown emotion. She’s somehow always understood me and for that I’ll…Read more Believe
Holes
Photo credit: Nathan Vines The ones you made in the wall Where we compressed unanswered questions Between skin and printed memories Incomplete stories Haunt the space that embraces What’s left Inside the holes made In your body A bloody cave Seeps into the empty tomb Feeling up Necrotic wombs Breeding generations of unhealed wounds Where…Read more Holes
H.A.L.T
According to folks in recovery, if we’re about to run straight into the arms of our next fix we should H.A.L.T.; as in stop and think about it for a second. Common sense, right? Instead of drinking, snorting, cutting, starving, shopping, smoking, sexting, eating, beating or getting into yet another disastrous relationship, we should ask…Read more H.A.L.T
Soundbathing
There’s no need to eat pills, powders or plants if you want to hear colors, see sounds or just remember where we come from. (Hint: We’re Love and stardust.) I discovered this in tenth grade after replacing weed with astral projection. Meditation was free and the side effects ranged from decreased tension to lucid vacations…Read more Soundbathing
Brideshead Revisited
It was one of those distastefully delicious English novels full of decorated heirs, lust, costumes, shameless wealth and immoral secrets saturated in religious guilt. There must’ve been love somewhere in the hastily written pages as the author, who’d recently fallen out of the sky, attempted to encounter grace. But who among us can actually say…Read more Brideshead Revisited
Disarmour
The universe doesn’t owe us an explanation, but that hasn’t stopped me from staring in awe as questions fall out of my open mouth. God, why did you let all this happen but not that? Why do we have free will? How big is the universe? Why was I born? Why can’t you physically wrap…Read more Disarmour
Walk in the Park
It took six years and ten days to let myself fall apart. Following you home in the car, wondering simultaneously if I’d lose you on the vintage green Honda in some horrific crash, or, if it was all over as soon as the flight from Cozumel touched ground. Truth be told, it ended the day…Read more Walk in the Park
Illuminatus
“Why are some of our lights off and others on, despite whatever a bunch of lab rats did when they were trapped alone in cages with piles of cocaine and Twinkies? The thing is, we’re not lab rats, and some of us won’t succumb to Twinkies or coke no matter how many times they try…Read more Illuminatus