Other G.O.A.T Queries: 1. Dear Agent, You appear to be a well connected genius. Your hair is very nice (even though your website picture is from like, five years ago). I am a very smart person who is well qualified to tell my story. I have fancy degrees and a marketable face. Also, I don’t…Read more The Greatest Query Letters of All Time
humor
The Death of Common Sense
Inspired by current events. Please remember, I am a French mutt. This is how I amuse myself. It also felt more effective than attempting to fight eternal and obtuse human ignorance with all my smart, frequently overlooked, overtly futile and eternally hopeless words. fin~
Status Update
The Manhattans count as gospel, by the way. Let’s just kiss and say goodbye...I don’t know if it was the lyrics or those blue suits, whatever it was, it worked. Good grief. I grieved for the last time we went for a coffee walk as a family, when Bubs still had four legs. The last…Read more Status Update
Betty Crocker-Ford
Check in, check out or check labels. If we're trying to lose weight, continue breathing and generally feel good, we shouldn’t eat the delicious, chemical conglomerations created by processed food corporations. This includes, but is not limited to: Anything on the entire 500 page menu at Cheesecake Factory, except steamed broccoli which no one wants…Read more Betty Crocker-Ford
Letter From a Private Room
~ The people here are sketchy so I won't address you directly in case this gets lost. I don't know what they've done to me but I feel like I'm being watched. Can't trust anyone these days which is partly how I ended up here. Honestly, if there'd been a bottom to begin with and…Read more Letter From a Private Room
Book of Love
"It’s an art opening for this Dutch guy Jost. His art sucks but he used to sell me really good pot.”-Sandy Lyle Barron was raised in a palace by two loving parents, Blythe and Iron John. They gave him every luxury money could buy; Voss water, handmade Australian linen sheets for his California king-sized bed,…Read more Book of Love
Baby It’s Cold Outside
Some people love winter. I get it. You ski and have 100 Pinterest boards dedicated to Hygge featuring cozy cabins, soup recipes, arm knitted scarves, steaming mugs topped with cinnamon sticks, majestic landscapes draped in white, glittering fondant. Chimneys, sleds and icicles make you nostalgic. There's even a special drawer for your collection of mittens.…Read more Baby It’s Cold Outside
Hello, My Name is Pleasantville
Pleasantville was a film written, directed and produced by Gary Ross in the late 90's. A dystopian fairy tale of sorts, it didn't do so well in the box office despite the talented, well known cast, stunning cinematography and nostalgic soundtrack. The film has always resonated with me because of its strong undertones of civil…Read more Hello, My Name is Pleasantville
