The smell of the sheets gave her away. She's a stripper. (I love my sisters) Why are we in her bed? There's no where else to sleep. It could hardly be called a bed, though this was sadly, infuriatingly familiar. A mattress pad on the floor of some glorified closet. Had I learned nothing? Had…Read more Mal Nuit
Shrink Rap
“Anybody who can move, can dance.” -Norma Canner
“It’s the mind that makes the body.”-Sojourner Truth
Fire Bird
Swallow the son Shine Your sin is not my shade Fly Ignited alive On paper This trauma mastery is a dime bag of bull shake Holy Shit! For Fox sake Your fragile egos Eat sensationalized lies For breakfast, lunch and Donner Inglorious gluttony Insatiable beasts Running at break neck speed A spectrum of death Walking,…Read more Fire Bird
Drop in the Ocean
Hue manatees See cows? Think you can break my art With horror stories Of motel swine exchanges For ass and cash The please we leave behind paintings, Suicide notes Of still lives Harbors Resentment Rent the price we pay For fear of never becoming who we were destined to be I will be the answer…Read more Drop in the Ocean
Imitating Art
Healing is the process of exchanging one kind of pain for another. Here's to celebrating the pain, warmth, grief and love of the blinding light; birth, death and resurrection. Kyle and I spent the day recreating this painting: "You didn’t understand what I am. I am love. I am pleasure. I am essence. I am…Read more Imitating Art
Good Mourning
I used to get so mad at Buddhism and obviously still fight with most of my daily devotions. Buddha and Jesus, just laughing and taking naps while the world is killed to death by assholes and germs. Incidentally, those two things appear to be closely related. Hey guys! What the heck are we supposed to…Read more Good Mourning
Blue
Anyone else plagued by waves of shame and guilt? Like you did something wrong, you’re in big, big trouble but you don’t know what you did and also, you’re not 5 anymore? Yea, me too. It’s normal. One of the many joys of surviving complex trauma is fearing punishment for crimes we didn’t commit. The…Read more Blue
Lean on Me
Two weeks ago we said goodbye to one of Ratchet's legs; legs that had run and hiked miles of trails all the way from Astoria, along the coast of the Pacific Northwest, the mountains of the Cascade Biway, the city streets of Portland and Seattle, even right down the center of Extraterrestrial Highway. Those…Read more Lean on Me
Status Update
The Manhattans count as gospel, by the way. Let’s just kiss and say goodbye...I don’t know if it was the lyrics or those blue suits, whatever it was, it worked. Good grief. I grieved for the last time we went for a coffee walk as a family, when Bubs still had four legs. The last…Read more Status Update
Running
Our sweet baby boy is having surgery on Monday. Tonight he had his last bath with four legs. If it weren’t for all hell breaking loose in the world, I’d be crying but my emotional faucet is shut off until further notice. Dissociating is my survival superpower. There’s no such thing as down time or…Read more Running
Be Ok
How are you? I've found it hard to think, read, sleep and even talk sometimes the past few days. For those of us with trauma histories, the current situation is pushing all our buttons. Why? Because trauma once threatened our sense of safety and control in the world, and now, it's happening all over again.…Read more Be Ok
