It's considered socially commendable to talk about your status as a war veteran, being the survivor of a natural disaster, shark attack or your amazing weight loss journey. People wildly applaud your bravery as you stand on farming equipment in your underpants getting weighed on national television. Lots of circumstances and challenges now come with campaigns,…Read more Witness
Shrink Rap
“Anybody who can move, can dance.” -Norma Canner
“It’s the mind that makes the body.”-Sojourner Truth
Hey, It’s Ok
Over the holidays I talked with a couple of girlfriends who were heartsick over games of emotional tug of war, also known as codependence. Codependent love goes like this: Here's all the shitty, unreasonable, terrible, horrible, no good things this person did and here's all the great, rule-following, generous, responsible, hard-working, sacrificial, exhausting, never-ending, perfect things I…Read more Hey, It’s Ok
Consumed
Last night I dreamt about amorphous blob creatures called muffies. They laid, thoughtless, purple, clam-like yet motionless and unclothed on yoga mats making moaning and sucking sounds with eyeballs connected to no thoughts other than to be fed. I spent the dream trying to manage their slimy groaning needs while actual work scenarios rushed up…Read more Consumed
Mum
It's Me! she said Like that store in Oak Bluffs A clever name ensuring identification would equate with profit It's Me! she said Of the shirt brother wanted Of the success sister achieved Of my crooked nose If it was not an extension of herself it didn't exist There are many things I can almost…Read more Mum
Genius
Thomas Wolfe had hypergraphia. His editor was patient. The end.
Love is.
Yesterday I bumped into some old writing; several thousand words chronicling the death of a decade which now looks like a worn out towel in my memory. It made me question love; why we need it, how to go about it, what it's for, why bother the risks. Last night I dreamt about an…Read more Love is.
W.A.I.T
When the sun's in your eyes sometimes you're blinded, so it'd make sense to wait until your sight returns before doing anything. In the movie Searching for Bobby Fischer his mentor says "don't move until you see it". He was teaching him to see each match in its entirety before making a move as part of…Read more W.A.I.T
More or Less
The recipe was complex. It wasn't the product of any single ingredient; chaotic poverty, violent neighborhoods, a biological rejection of breast milk, my father's drinking, a decade of sexual abuse, ballet, track, modeling, cheerleading, gymnastics, being the smart, good, catholic girl who could babysit, clean, cook, say helpful things, the girl who got beat…Read more More or Less
For What it’s Worth
Strangers often tell me their life story. The theme goes like this: Something or someone hurt me so I do these things which hurt me or others to try and fix, erase or control how worthless or unworthy I feel. They tell me about their important, extraordinary accomplishments or list of personal slights. The range of…Read more For What it’s Worth
The Perfect Storm
To get out of the projects, my parents moved us into a partially condemned apartment building with faulty electricity and no running hot water. It was a relief and discomfort at the same time; you a lose a network, a sense of rank and familiarity when you go someplace new. I could anticipate the violence…Read more The Perfect Storm