I’m officially writing the book after abandoning all codependent fantasies that the same elves who make shoes would show up one night and magically transform 5 years of blogging into a glitter-bound manuscript ready for submission. They would’ve also made me my own pair of signature boots; something feminine, with a heel, that I could also walk in that would match everything in my closet. Alas, I got real and so far it’s working out great. 10,766 words and counting which means I will be posting and playing here much less. Less, but not never since I can’t write the book on lunch breaks because we can only afford one subscription to Word and this site lives in my phone. I promise to visit.

Saying it out loud is like announcing you’re going on a diet or becoming a minimalist; accountability. Hey e, why are you buying that 300 lb. pallet of mayonnaise? So I can make egg salad whenever I want?

Since buying Word I realized my blog doesn’t format paragraphs and I have no idea why or how to fix it which has created a sense of foreboding dread because I know eventually some publisher or editor is going to get my manuscript and send it back with a thousand edits using that Track Edit feature which I also don’t know how to use. That right there is confidence…wrapped in fear, because I’m still me.

Just for fun here’s a list of things I’ve researched for the book so far:

  • Historical Blizzards
  • The Bible
  • 1970’s shades of green, Mustang
  • Topographical New England map
  • Genesis; Phil Collins, Abraham
  •  The Hero’s Journey
  • Summer of 77 top 40
  • Ocala, fossils, Silver Springs
  • Julliard
  • Vince Guarldi
  • Statistics on Homelessness
  • How do you spell spinabifida?
  • Frozen lemonade flavors
  • Chaos theory
  • Chaos quotes
  • The little french song (which then required singing, phonetic spelling and 7 minutes of frustration because I couldn’t remember which french song I meant and it turns out there are more than a few)
  • Merde
  • Unplanned pregnancy rates
  • Chapter outline worksheet (Which I found but didn’t use and instead drew a map which has been profoundly more helpful because I’m visual. This required first finding tape, my sketchbook and the right pen which took way more time than I planned but now my map sits under the monitor so I know exactly where I’m going and that’s when the words just started pouring out.)
  • Defunding mental health institutions, U.S
  • Editors, NY (I’m getting Grammerly thanks to Cherilyn cause who can afford those rates?)
  • Weetabix
  • Vintage candy
  • Peanut caramel thing
  • Chevy Impala
  • Bill Brasky
  • Dr. Scholls, vintage wood (now I kinda want a pair; they made the best sound.)

Do you ever check your research history? What’s the weirdest thing you ever looked up?

Ok, tea, then back to it. Happy Sunday! Happy writing! xo

26 thoughts on “Blooming

      • Are you psychic? I was researching writers this morning to see what I could learn from their path to publishing and landed on the power of my truth and maintaining the perseverance to keep digging it out.


      • Yes, I am a bit psychic but that’s not why I said what I said. It’s a phrase or phrases I thought you’d know, doing the work you do. I learned it from the feminists first. In one of your posts you mentioned about ‘doing the right thing, no matter the cost’ – I quote imperfectly I’m sure but that’s truth to power. You may or may not like the writings on feminismandreligion.com – I don’t agree with everything people say but there’s lots I do agree with and indeed have learned a lot from them about how to be a woman in the world today.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Ahhh, yes that expression is familiar. When it comes to extreme views I tend to listen, empathize with the anger, feel my own stomach clench at historical violence, systemic patriarchal oppression, injustice, inequality, fear, greed and then find truth lives somewhere between heaven and hell.


      • The somewhere between heaven and hell sounds too much like the hollow compromise from where I’m sitting – at the moment. Truth being somewhere else altogether is where I’m going – or trying to. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I respect and understand that. I often choose a passive role because I’ve had to fight so many other people and circumstances just to survive. Today I feel like throwing all the kicks and punches but it’s like there’s this little Buddha or catholic priest on my shoulder wagging their finger. ‘Don’t quit 5 minutes before the miracle’ what effing miracle?!’ But then I do nothing except breathe and slump into some corner.


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